WFPB Update

I've been eating Whole Food, Plant Based for a while now...although I say that with a little shrug. There have been some major slip ups and derailments that caused some major shifts and redirects too many times to count. Every failure is a flop that leads me closer to my mastery of this way of eating and uniting my soul a bit more, though. I'm learning quite a bit about myself, the journey, and this body of mine.

Consistency is key and NOT setting a deadline for my 'success' are pretty vital to me in particular.
I suck at moderation and have to cut it out entirely so my cravings don't creep up and captivate me.

Being "CASUAL" leads me to some "CASUALTIES." Melodramatic, I know. I haven't actually had meat since Easter, so I'm good on animal casualties. But, my body falling a part a little more feels like a casualty.

Timing will NEVER be perfect. I may never perfect this way of eating. But it's all about PROGRESS, NOT PERFECTION.

I do know when I eat this way, I lose weight, my intestines work better, and my stabbing pains & heat intolerance are a bit better. (I'm saying I can handle 71 degrees and lower and the power of a MILLION knives/axes reduces to 909,099). Every little improvement is a big deal for me, though. So, I'll take it! I've seen how others REVERSE their heart disease and no longer need bypass surgery or how others REVERSE their diabetes and no longer need ANY medications. I'm not expecting something as drastic quickly, but I do expect that positive results will follow.

I've learned for me to be successful LONG TERM, I have to have 3 key ingredients:

1. Purpose
2. Plan
3. SuPPort

Without a significant purpose beyond 'losing weight,' 'feeling great,' and tapping into the innate, I would fail every time. My health has declined so drastically that I am desperate for any slight improvement. No better purpose than when all of your sense become desensitized and your body matches the age of a 90 year old in your 30s. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone and hopefully others have a greater purpose to drive such a big change. 

PLAN, PLAn, PLan, Plan, plan! When my fridge and pantry get down to only two compliant ingredients that require cutting or cooking, I fail. I inevitably turn to the easy crackers or sugary treats for the quick pick me up. Having plenty of options that are easy, easily accessible, and don't take too much brain power at 7 pm has led to success. Batch cook, menu plan, and have back ups. 

SuPPorT~ I have the support of my husband, but he adds meat, milk, cheese, butter, etc to his foods. (Which I'm okay with...this is my journey). I needed extra help from others eating this way and found several on Facebook. It's been a huge blessing. I also have to involve God along the way and I am amazed at the difference it makes. 

Here are some of my Instagram (blessedms) posts specifically:

(Some were failures, like this steel cut oats with cinnamon and dried fruit)

(Because of my limitations, I use some processed foods. I hope to eventually cut out all, but until then I have found some good stuff). 

 

(I had 5 grain cereal or steel cut oats every morning for breakfast, until I realized I'm reacting to the oats. I found my LEAP results and sure enough...oats. =( Since cutting it out, my rash and issues cleared up within a few days).

My amazing hubby was able to prepare a good amount of food beforehand so I could just pull out what I needed and reheat in the microwave.

 

 

Day 2 and Day 3

Day 2 and 3 were a bit more difficult.

The family was munching on Reese's and brownies. Ohhhh, the temptation. And my intestines were letting me know that this is all new. :)

But, I've kept at it. On Day 2 I learned there are several things with hidden dairy, oil and sugar. I'm not beating myself up over it though. I would like to get to the point where I use nothing processed and no oils. But for now that isn't reasonable. And it's okay.

Muscles and headaches were horrible. Nausea and fatigue were wretched.

Day 1 WOW

Yesterday was DAY 1 of going all in on WFPB/SAD to WOW in 30 days (I'm allowing myself oil).

I have slowly been integrating principles of WFPB/WoW into my diet since last year. I'm so glad I have taken the journey slowly.

July- 🚫 Sugar
August- 🚫 Sugar + 1 new vegetable per week
September- 🚫 Sugar + 3 diff veggies per day

As I added in more vegetables to my diet, it left less room for junk. I did notice small improvements in pain, energy and sleep.

October-December>>>I fell off the wagon! Hard. I hurt more, slept worse, and my fatigue was horrible. It was actually then that I could tell a difference in all three. It wasn't monumental, but it was a noticeable change.

January- 🚫 Sugar, meat only 3 xs/week.
February- 🚫 Sugar, meat only 2 x/week
End of February and most of March I freaked out because my health was out of control and I didn't know why. I had experienced all of these symptoms off and on throughout 2015, but now it hit hard. I was being tested for thyroid cancer and learned for the first time in 18 YEARS---almost 2 decades---my thyroid was more efficient and needed LESS thyroid meds. Nothing like the scare of thyroid cancer and unbelievable pain for more than a year to motivate you to jump all the way in.

I noticed that I was dragging my feet to really go 100%. But, the stabbing eye/face/head pains has been quite unbearable. Imagine the pain you had when you were in the beginning stages of labor 1-5 cm, plus had a migraine, and add a spinal tap and spinal head ache to it. That is how my head has felt for the last year. Truthfully it has been hard to concentrate on very simple things like vision, walking, standing, talking. Not 100% of the time (unless I got too hot, too stressed, or did too much). But, it has been bad enough that I'm finally on pain meds. Antiseizure meds, to be exact. And I don't like them and don't want to stay on them forever. But, after 18 years of pain every single day, I'm that desperate.

I guess it took this much to cause me try an extreme diet. Many MS people, heart disease patients, and even some cancer patients have had excellent success. So, here it goes!!!

I've gone more than 6 weeks without meat.
1 day without dairy.
1 day without sugar. (Not counting things like bread and salad dressing).
1 day without eggs.
And a bit of oil and processed foods (salad dressing, bread, peanut butter, canned tomatoes).

I feel lighter. My intestines are letting me know this is a change. But a change for the better. :)

Bring on the rest of Day 2.

{Sorry in advance for my boring posts that will be coming. I will be blogging to remember how I felt each day and what I ate}.

Breakfast-toast with peanut butter
Snack-celery with PB (too much PB, I know).
Lunch- salad
Dinner-spaghetti with capers and artichoke, squash, bread with balsamic vinegar and oil

Need Needles?

If I never see another needle again, I think I'd be happy. I've had 5 spinal taps (2 unsuccessful/partially successful), a thyroid biopsy (2 doctors-1 failed), steroid injections all over my head (? Sort of successful/complications), and today had injections into the back of my head/neck/occipital nerves(1/2 good, 1/2 bad). On the right side he accidentally got a blood vessel, but it wasn't bad. The left side however was different. Immediately the pain increased and I'm happy to be home and in bed. We move tomorrow (some stuff to one house and the other to my in law's house). My timing tends to not be great. :) haha

I would be happy to never have another needle stuck into my body with parts being drawn out. But, I am also grateful for modern medicine. 

I've had some extreme medications, diets, and advice from medical professionals over the 18 years of my health journey. But, I tend to get worse and deplete my resources. 

Currently I'm on the following medications usually prescribed for:::

• Thyroid 
• Depression
• Insulin Resistance (PCOS, not diabetes)
• Parkinson's/Persistent Vegetative State (MS fatigue)
• Seizures (nerve pain)
• Vitamins for malabsorption (ever since that doc messed up, I started to die, with my intestines being the first to shut down)

I went to this Ophthalmologist because he thought my Occipital Neuralgia would get better. It didn't. For YEARS I've had stabbing pains throughout my body (ovaries, ribs, stomach/intestines, head, gall bladder {got that one out, though, happy dance💃}). But, for a year now I've had hair falling out, stabbing eye/face/head pains, swelling, increased pain, nausea, dizziness, and worsening fatigue off an on (plus the other hyperthyroid issues). The last 3-4 months my pain has been so intense that I can't concentrate on conversations. I prefer to write because I can take breaks, reread, have it read to me, or come back when I'm doing okay. Most of the time when someone is talking to me, I can only take in a portion of what they said. The rest of the time I am SO focused on breathing, not vomiting, standing up, seeing, and hearing. All very basic things for everyone, but not me. One of my nerve pain/seizure medications took most of the pain away, but the other issues increased to the point of not being able to function. It's been extremely difficult for me because I LOVE being connected to others, listening to them, sympathizing and offering support. But, truth be told the last several months I've struggled selfishly, because I can only offer that in full when I've read it or I try to overcompensate by sharing something in my life that can relate to the small piece of what I heard. In the end I have talked more about me than I'm used to. Sorry!! I really am trying to listen. :) Thank you for being patient through my faux pas and forgetfulness. Bless you for your patience with me. :) 

I usually don't take pain medications. I've had pain, nausea and fatigue every day for 18 years and managed okay. (Okayish once I got pregnant). But the past year I've reached the point where I can't function. So, I'm on meds that are causing problems. 

Some people say eating a WHOLE FOOD, PLANT BASED diet/way of eating is EXTREME. I say trying all these tests, medications, surgeries, interventions, and specialists all while getting worse and more and MORE diseases is EXTREME. Why not jump the last of the way in? I've gone 1 month with no meat and after Mother's Day I will cut out 

• Sugar
• Dairy
• Eggs
• Possibly Oil

Let's just see if it improves things. If not, no biggie. Everything else isn't working too well. It can't hurt things (I will continue my B12 and Vitamin D). 

{{{And in case you're an unlicensed Doctor ready to prescribe your own regimen and advice...plants have protein. 1 cup navy beans = 1 sausage link + 2 pieces of bacon + 1 hotdog. I'm not worried. Calcium also is found in plants. There's great research available supporting a reversal of heart disease and symptoms of autoimmune diseases and even preventing cancer on a WOW (Word of Wisdom) / WFPB diet/way of eating.  :) }}}

Benign

I've had some of the same problems lately that I had all last year, but some new ones too!

• Feeling like I swallowed a rock that won't go away.
• Trouble breathing
• Irregular heartbeat
• Increased anxiety and depression
• Trouble concentrating (The last two times I taught RS, I noticed I couldn't follow someone's comments longer than the beginning statement or two. It takes EXTRA energy to focus on breathing, not passing out, seeing, not vomiting and standing).
• Insomnia
• Burning from the neck up and freezing from my arms down
• Increased weakness and fatigue
• Severe nausea
• Shakiness
• Increased appetite
• Hair falling out a little more
• (Plus all my regular stuff...stabbing pains, heat intolerance, walking issues, vision/hearing, etc)

All last year I had doctor after doctor say, "There is definitely something wrong with you, but I'm stumped/don't know what to do." Each doctor I would ask, "I feel like my hormones are off," and they'd respond, "Oh, I'm SURE your hormones are off. But, I wouldn't know what to do if we tested them. Take this..." ($100 cream, birth control, nausea pill to counteract the side effects, steroid injectections into my head, etc). Since I had no insurance for a while and then insurance that only covered doctors in my town (and NO endocrinologist in the town and only ONE dermatologist), I had to wait. I went to my family doctor and told him I wanted a referral to an endocrinologist and had done my research. I gave them the number and info. But, I had to push off my November appointment and move it to February. 

I almost didn't go to the endocrinologist, but felt like I should. I was surprised when the doctor called in another doctor. They both felt growths on my thyroid and lined up tests to check for cancer. One doctor hurried to see if they could fit me in that day. No luck. I knew my uncle and aunt had their thyroids removed (one fully, one half), but didn't know the specifics. The endocrinologists said I needed to do an ultrasound, but the tech makes a big difference. So, I had to come back to KC to do it. (3 hour drive one way). It's been lots of tests, waiting, tests, waiting. I learned that my aunt, cousin, uncle and grandma had to have their thyroid taken out. Humph. I also learned that for the first time EVER, I have HYPERthyroidism. I've had Hashimoto's thyroiditis-HYPOthyroidism for almost 2 decades. I always needed MORE medication. I would be on one medication for years, then it would stop working, I'd have to change and increase, increase, and then change. (3 different thyroid medications since 2002 when they finally found it). But, now I need LESS! I don't know if it is because I was eating the Word of Wisdom way or if there is something else going on. But, I find it interesting. 

I did have to get a biopsy at a neck surgical place. I felt so bad for so many people there with things hanging out of their necks. I was so grateful for my less invasive test. There was a pathologist, doctor, student, and nurse. They were supposed to do two pulls, but ended up doing more. They first numb your neck (feels like lots of bees stinging you and then burning). The student did the first two pokes/shaking/pulls. But, they didn't get enough cells. So, they had to do it again. The student did the third and the doctor did the last. She was a young doctor who obviously was out of practice. She just kept digging and digging that needle, moving it all around, moving the ultrasound wand, pushing it harder on my neck, and trying and trying UNSUCCESSFULLY. You can't swallow or talk or else it will move the thyroid and needle. I can deal with lots of pain and am patient, but she was taking SO long that I had to raise my hand to stop her. She never got anything, but I was glad when the pathologist announced that we had enough cells and could stop. YAY. My husband had to use one of his 10 vacation days to take me, but it ended up being a good time to spend with him. My in laws are SO wonderful to help us with my daughter. The day started a bit rough, but ended well.

After time, we got news that the nodule/growths are benign. No cancer. I know my aunt and uncle had the same results but had to get their thyroids (full and half) out. My aunt had to do a biopsy every six months for 2.5 years before they took hers out!!! They still don't know why I'm having some problems and I have to see an ENT next. But, for now...good news and I will TAKE IT! =) 

You can tell the two places they went into on my neck

Here are the POSITIVE things that have come from it all (so far, I'm sure the list will grow):

• Connecting and understanding others who have had similar(ish) situations.
• Learned new things about the human body (maybe I should have gone into medicine).
• Support and love from many (Until 5 years ago, I rarely, if ever, shared my struggles or issues. I am naturally an introvert and don't like people worrying about me. Most people have been really understanding, loving, and supportive. I feel so blessed). 
• Priesthood blessings have been a real power and relief to me!
• Some weight loss (ha)
• I will take hypothyroidism over hyperthyroidism (I don't know if it's because I've had 18 years to get used to HYPO or just because I went up and down and all over the place. But, it looks like I have at least the heart issues under control, for the most part (kind of). Some have to go on heart meds! Ugh)
• Appreciation...and again, CONNECTIONS! I just can't thank all of you enough. 

How are YEW? How arrrrre You?

I remember the sweet Kenyans chasing our matatus (mini van taxis) through the slums outside of Nairobi. They would laugh, smile, pop a thumb up and say, "How are you? How are YeeeWWWW?" We would respond, "Great! How are you?" Since most didn't have the privilege of education, they hadn't learned any English beyond this simple phrase. They would stare at us and repeat just as enthusiastically as before, "How are you?" They had nothing, but were some of the happiest people I have ever met.

No shoes. 

Some hole-ridden Disney shirt from the 80's and a pair of pants barely hanging on. 

MAYBE one piece of fruit for the whole day to eat. 

Chewing constantly on wood. 

Surrounded by a black river, sewage through the street, rubbish all over. 

Lucky if they had a tiny home consisting of a filthy assortment of cardboard, corrugated metal, and a dirt floor.

But they were HAPPY!

I left Kenya almost 12 years ago and it forever changed me. I remember coming back to my tiny apartment, attending a RS social, and leaving early bawling because I felt so utterly blessed. My perspective had changed. I really did feel like a mzungu (meaning both 'white/European decent' and 'rich'). I had returned to the same situation, but my eyes had been opened!

(I have ALWAYS been grateful for indoor plumbing)

It's funny to look back on my experiences. I didn't feel rich by American standards, but I did by Soweto slum standards. I came back to a job, a working car, an ability to walk and go outside every day, connections to others, internet, a phone, tv, incredible friends, wonderful family, health insurance, plenty of food, opportunities to serve in church and community, and had clothes with no holes! Before Kenya, I felt lucky, optimistic, and blessed. But I had never considered myself rich.

I really was rich.

The past two years, I've again felt NOT rich. We went a year with no internet. We had no tv for a year. {Which is saying a lot for someone who is almost entirely homebound with a rambunctious toddler}. We have gone almost a year with only one working car and me only being able to go out once a week typically. There were times I had to get toilet paper and milk from my in laws because our $5/week grocery budget was still too high. Our medical bills climbed, we added new health diseases, and had little to no work, health coverage, or hope from time to time. I didn't complain when a neurologist wanted me in the hospital, a dentist wanted to fix a cavity, and a doctor wanted tests done but I simply told them I couldn't afford it. I went without for over a year. But, I reminded myself often that I wasn't as bad off as SO many people across the world. In September 2015, things seemed to be turning around a bit. My hard working hubby was hired on permanently and was getting OVERTIME! In 3.5 months we made the same amount as we made the first 8.5 months of the year. We were ALL getting insurance, my aunt gave me money to go see a doctor about all my health problems, a friend sent money making it possible to visit family for Christmas and we were able to pay our bills instead of going into debt. Ahhhh, making it paycheck to paycheck again...life was good!

After reading about Nephi and Laman's different reactions to their WILDERNESS (and what they thought could make them happy), my hubby read some quotes along with our studies...

Elder Neal A. Maxwell shared how great lessons often come after difficulties: “Nephi’s broken bow doubtless brought to him some irritation, but not immobilizing bitterness. After all, he was just trying to feed the extended family, so why should he have to contend as well with a broken bow? Yet out of that episode came a great teaching moment. Irritation often precedes instruction” (If Thou Endure It Well [1996], 128).

I have had moments in my life where I have been wandering, I have been irritated but hopeful, and also when I have experienced immobilizing bitterness. The longer I stayed in the valley of hopelessness without reaching out for help or in the desert of despair, depression, discouragement, and distrust, the more I wandered. Thankfully I continue to learn that Christ, the Prince of Peace, Living Waters, our Redeemer is ALWAYS there for me. I have received a great deal of instruction after some great irritations. (No one on earth has experienced more than Christ).

Another favorite:::

Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught that adversity can help stimulate necessary growth in our lives:

“May I share some suggestions with you who face … the testing that a wise Heavenly Father determines is needed even when you are living a worthy, righteous life and are obedient to His commandments.

“Just when all seems to be going right, challenges often come in multiple doses applied simultaneously. When those trials are not consequences of your disobedience, they are evidence that the Lord feels you are prepared to grow more (see Proverbs 3:11–12). He therefore gives you experiences that stimulate growth, understanding, and compassion which polish you for your everlasting benefit. To get you from where you are to where He wants you to be requires a lot of stretching, and that generally entails discomfort and pain” (in Conference Report, Oct. 1995, 18; or Ensign, Nov. 1995, 16–17).

Wow! YESSSSS!!! This was our past year and a half! We aren't out of the woods just yet. But I am quite happy that we are here instead of where we were in 2014 and 2015!!

Before I moved to Kansas, if anyone had asked me if I considered myself a relatively patient, compassionate, optimistic person who had experienced a great deal of pain, suffering, depression, loneliness, fatigue, and struggles financially, emotionally, and physically, I would have emphatically shouted "YES!!!!"  But, little did I know God had some plans for stretching on the horizon. I don't feel like my experiences have changed who I am, but instead just made me more so. I am closer to God and Christ. I have more compassion, faith, understanding, and hope. I thought I could accurately predict who would help the most in dark times and where to turn for assistance. In many cases I would have predicted well, some I would have been way off on, and a few I NEVER would have guessed. I think it has been those who have struggled the most, who have been stretched beyond their capacity, who TRULY do understand financial, emotional, physical, social, etc struggles who have been my greatest help and allies. 

To anyone else who is being "STRETCHED," my heart goes out to you. I hope that you are blessed with angels on earth, someone to turn to, and a strength, peace, hope, or outpouring of love that you haven't experienced before. It will eventually get better. Way, way later than you anticipate, hope, or pray for, but as long as you keep trying, turn to God and reach out, it WILL {eventually} get better. OR you'll get stronger so you can BETTER handle it. Either way. It will get better. 

Mountain Moving with a teaspoon or a shovel?

Have you ever been so sick that you stayed on the couch or in bed for several days? Have you ever been so sick that you had to stay inside for 6 or 7 whole days? Have you ever NOT been able to drive (broken car or another reason) for weeks or months and missed the freedom and independence? By the end were you going "Stir Crazy"? That has been my life for the last several years. I typically ONLY go out once a week. IF I go out more than that, I pay for it (more pain, vision, hearing and intestines are bad, more stabbing pains in eyes/face/head, increased nausea, fatigue and weakness, as well as twitching muscles or shakiness and more numbness and tingling). BUT, there are times that it is worth it. Lately I've been asking my hubby to take me on drives after he gets home from work. It is hard to go from working 14 hour days, being incredibly social, traveling, and visiting my family, to NOTHING. 

I suppose the past week or two it has gotten to me.

I've thought a lot lately about MOUNTAINS and the FAITH to move them. I always have had faith in God, Jesus and their power. At 4 or 5 I remember praying for things and believing they would happen. My little prayers were answered. When I was 8 or 9, I cried to my parents about how you knew the gospel of Jesus Christ (Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-day Saints) was true, I prayed and gained my own testimony with incredible confidence. Fast forward to when I was 19 and thought I was going blind and deaf, woke up with huge bruises for no reason, intestines screamed at me when I got too hot, had to stop exercising and gained 90 pounds in less than a year. I wondered if I had enough faith to move THIS mountain. 

I prayed EVERY SINGLE DAY for TWELVE years for healing. I believed that I could be healed IF it was God's will. But, I learned it was NOT God's will for me to be healed. So, I accepted it and dealt with it. In looking back, I think it was good that it took almost 5 years to discover what was wrong with me. I think it was good that I lived in denial for a long time afterwards too. I simply learned to adapt. 

• When I couldn't see, I turned my head in the direction of others talking and pretended like nothing was wrong until my vision returned. Or I sat or felt for a wall to balance myself until I could see again.
• When I couldn't hear, I learned how to read lips (not great, but enough to manage). I nodded a lot until my hearing returned. 
• When I couldn't see OR hear at the same time, I just nodded sporadically and waited.
• When I fell or dropped things, I just laughed it off.
• When I was dizzy, I learned how to move slower, sit more, and distract people with questions.
• When I was depressed, I learned to serve others and find out more about them.
• It took me a while to correlate my heat intolerance with my issues, but once I learned the connection I covered myself with ice packs, did more inside (a/c) and learned to always check where a trash can was (in case I had to vomit) and where a bathroom was in every place I visited.

I was 19 and scared, but quickly learned to just make the best of things. I learned that I could gain strength through God and Jesus with prayer and priesthood blessings. I had faith to move forward even when the answer was "NO" or "NOT YET." As new symptoms came with new relapses and new diseases have been added to my broken bod, I have adapted and pushed forward.

Fast forward to 2014 and 2015 and I started to wonder again if I could climb these mountains. It had grown to a mountain range! 

My daughter and I decided to color and my hands were working well enough for me to create this to visually express myself. 

2014 I thought was bad with a move, change in career, only being paid $600 the first two months, paying for THREE homes, a MS relapse, worsening side effects from my MS med (horrible diarrhea every single day for 7.5 months along with a bit of hair loss), and being robbed! 

It turns out those were more like HILLS. 

2015 was much worse with 

Two Furloughs.

Two Mini-Strokes.

FOUR robberies (incl Topeka).

Hair falling out so much that I was balding.

Stabbing eye/face/head pains with no answers for a while.

No internet or tv for a year, and $25-$5/week budget for groceries.

Sensation of bugs crawling all over and toenail ripped off (cursed MS).

Hubs not being able to work-didn't recover as quickly from 2nd mini-stroke.

Asking for help and being rejected or told to wait until we weren't nearly as desperate.

Depressing conversations like selling everything, breaking lease, moving in with family, and who would take care of our daughter if we both died or became bedridden or incapacitated in any way.

I felt hopeless.

But each time I felt supreme despair, someone would surprise me because they were inspired.

THANKFULLY, even though I didn't reach out enough or talk to enough about our struggles, there were some angels on earth who were inspired. It gave me hope and showed me that God IS aware of us. He worked MIRACLES through them and I'm eternally grateful. All while I was trying to climb the mountain and pretending like I was fine even as I was falling off a cliff. Kind of like when I started to die...I didn't reach out and pretended like I was fine. (Until I couldn't and collapsed at work, but then I just worked on my couch. Or when I ended up in the ER with my eyes rolling in the back of my head, slurring my words, etc). "I'm fine."

(I wish I had pictures of all of my angels on earth!)

Jesus said, "If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you."

I never could imagine a situation where I would NEED to move a mountain. But, I believed anything was POSSIBLE with God. Lately, though, I've been doubting my own ability to move these mountains placed in front of me. The other day I read again about the pioneers who LITERALLY carved out stone from a mountain and MOVED it to the sacred spot in Salt Lake City. It took 40 years for them to finish the temple! There were many who sacrificed an incredible amount to build a temple that has blessed a prodigious amount of people. While I hope it doesn't take ME 40 freakin years, I HOPE that I can move this mountain. It may only bless my sweet lil family and me, but it sure would be a blessing!

Speaking specifically about my HEALTH mountain, I have thought about how stone by stone, I may have to do the work over an extended amount of time before I see great results. But what if it ONLY takes me a year before I see great results? All these years I've tried the world's way (HcG, pills, diets like Weight Watchers or Raw, shakes like Slim Fast or Herbalife, excessive exercise, etc). All failed attempts resulted in minimal success and a lot of frustration. WHY NOT TRY GOD's WAY? I always figured I was great with the Word of Wisdom (https://www.lds.org/topics/word-of-wisdom?lang=eng)  since I've never tasted alcohol, tea, coffee, tobacco, or recreational drugs. Heck, I've never even tasted things like Mountain Dew or Coke because I didn't want stimulants in my body (my sister's cardiologist was glad we didn't consume caffeine). But, it turns out I was focusing a lot on the do NOTs (and received blessings by not having those addictions) and not focusing enough on the DOs. The world and nutritionists teach the opposite...eat MORE meat->Protein every 3 hours focusing on animal sources and eat LESS grains! The word of wisdom says GRAINS are the foundation and staff of life. Then add a variety of fruits and vegetables with meat sparingly, specifically during winter, cold, or famine. I have changed my diet SLOWLY and in July started following the Word of Wisdom step by step (in small ways) and started losing weight. I also cut out sugar (one of my worst inflammatories). I did it July, August, and September and lost 5 pounds each month. January 1st I decided to jump all the way in with the Word of Wisdom by only eating meat three times a week, and using a variety of grains, fruits and vegetables. Within ONE month I lost 11.5 pounds! I've NEVER lost that much weight in a month and it was easy. I wasn't hungry, I didn't count calories and learned new foods I loved (brussels sprouts and artichokes). I had no idea plants had calcium, protein, and all I needed! I continue to lose weight and while I can't say I feel GREAT, I'm having a little less stabbing pains and a little more strength. This past Sunday I walked the ENTIRE time on my own. I don't know if I have done that for at least two years. 

I'm kicking myself for waiting 17-18 YEARS before I tried God's way. Until now, I feel like I was trying to move my mountain with a TEASPOON and found myself tired, overwhelmed and disappointed. Other times I was just circling the mountain over and over and over. I felt a bit like Anna in Frozen trying to climb a mountain. 

 

 On Sunday, I shared some of my testimony about this topic and an awesome gal shared this with me. 
I love it and it fits perfectly!

 For anyone else out there who has a mountain (or mountain RANGE) you are climbing, I hope you can reach out and gain strength, hope, and patience with yourself as you're moving forward. God moves mountains in different ways-sometimes we move the soil beneath our feet. Other times it is so steep that we have to get on our hands and knees. Sometimes there is a path already carved into the mountain so we can ride up the mountain more easily. But, you're not alone. I've been feeling alone off and on the past year. It's Satan whispering (or screaming) of the loneliness, fear and despair. Yesterday I underestimated the openness of Facebook and realized that I'm not actually alone in the journey. Thankfully I always have my husband and wonderful family (close and amazing in laws who have supported me SO much and my family who lives far away). But, it helps to have others who have climbed their own mountains who reach down to help me up.

Steps Christ would have climbed to meet Pilate

 Sometimes I have a hard time with who I used to be, what I used to be able to do and who I am now (with so many limitations). But, who I am as a spirit matters more than who I am physically. My whole soul is NOT just my body.

Thank you to those of you who have helped lift me physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Thank you to those of you who did for me what I couldn't do for myself physically.