12 Days of 2015

I have sent out family Christmas letters twice in my life. This year I didn't want to because 1) It sucked. 2) It's expensive and I'd rather spend my $mulla$ on visiting my family for the holidays.

But, I decided to do this year's E Family Christmas letter for 2015 via the www. (Because of privacy, I won't post pix of my little one---sorry, but if we're friends on fb, you've seen enough =)).

My first draft of our 2015 summary, in the note of "12 days of Christmas," went something like this...

1- 1 ambulance ride
2- 2 mini strokes, 2 furloughs, 2 moves
3- 3 new health issues for me (Occipital Neuralgia, Alopecia Areata, and Melasma)
4- 4 robberies in a little over a year
5- 5 months with little to NO work
6- 6 months of daily intense stabbing eye pain and 6 months before the state of KS finally decided on our application for assistance (they said it isn't typical wait time; we were just one of the unlucky ones with system crashes, changes, miscommunication on their part, etc). When we desperately needed help, I reached out to several sources and was turned away.
7- 7 times when I thought we wouldn't make it
8- 8 different specialists in various medical fields
9- 9 diseases in my one body (not including issues like melasma, insulin resistance and dystmetabolic syndrome which are just moderately annoying)
10- 10 different medical bills stacking up
11- 11 months of losing my hair and growing bald spots
12- 12 angels on earth who helped us financially with generously giving money (one anonymous).

I thought back on how much we survived when we wondered how we possibly could. There were scary moments, depressing moments, isolation, fear, frustration, and pain. I thought of how much my vision had opened figuratively and closed physically as I learned what it meant to really struggle to provide for basics and accomplish the mundane. My hubby and I had to have hard conversations about which utilities to pay, who would take care of our daughter if my husband died, and if we had to break our lease, move in with the in-laws and which items we would sell first if we lost everything. (Thankfully we got close to all happening, but didn't end up needing to deal with any of these possible, but hypothetical situations). I remembered how isolated I felt as my health declined, more friends talked about us than to us and judged us without knowing even half of our story, and the limitations we had with bad health, bad finances and a broken car. But, I also thought back to how much closer I felt to God and Jesus. How some friends reached out with a helping hand, listening ear and a call, text, or message. Some literally saved us from losing everything and fed & clothed us. How family members were our saving grace as they were inspired to offer assistance before we asked and even after we had asked more than once before. I am amazed at the heart and generosity of so many who were inspired at just the right moment when they knew little to nothing of the magnitude of our situation. While I knew it could always be worse, I learned to stop saying it!

This past month or two things have finally turned around for good I think (it's truthfully been difficult for a year and a half). Each time I was on the verge of hopelessness, some angel on earth would feel inspired to reach out to us. Every time I thought God wasn't there, He was right there and surprised me over and over. While it has been a tough year, it has also been a BLESSED year. I revised my "12 moments/memories of 2015," and came up with this instead...

12- Angels on Earth who saved us financially, physically and emotionally by giving
11- Babysitters for K bug who helped me immensely
10- Times this year I was able to get out and about ON MY OWN (not for a doctor's appointment or church).
9- Date nights I got with my hot hubby, many times with a free babysitter!!!
8- Family outings (day trips, drives, and even celebrating a few friend's birthdays)
7- Times I was amazed that we survived! I was amazed by God's tender mercies, miraculous assistance and renewed hope I felt.
6- Medical specialists who helped me in big and small ways.
5-$5/week grocery budget worked some weeks and we managed well (not always, but thank you cc companies, friends, and family).
4- Months of PERMANENT work at the same job! (We did have 1.5 months that we could have kept, but instead came back for the railroad which ended up giving us 0 more days of work).
3- Celebrated 3 years of marriage to my phenomenal best friend and 3 years of being mom to an incredible daughter.
2- Times I get to see my family this year!!!
1- Working, safe, reliable car.

Our family has gained a greater appreciation for our innumerable blessings, God's miraculous work, the generosity, love, and support of many wonderful friends and family, and a closer connection to our maker and our Savior. Our struggles pale in comparison to many others, but for us it was a struggle where we learned much through it all. Thank you to those of you, especially our angels on earth! Thank you to those who gave food, clothes, free babysitting, a call, text, message, card, and money. I am grateful that in the second half of this year we have been able to help others in need in small ways, as well. We are doing MUCH better now and I have tremendous hope for 2016. I am overcome with gratitude, peace and HOPE!

We hope that your 2016 is also incredible! May you see God's hand and feel the Savior's love in many ways.

Love,
US